A Mail-Order Illusion Read online

  She slid on the small slippers that went with the outfit, and even though the soles were a little scratchy, she was grateful for the protection. Not only were there sticks and rocks scattered on the dry ground, but there had to be all sorts of rocks and debris in the riverbed as well.

  “How’s it fitting?” Jimmy called from the other side of the rocks.

  She jerked and darted her gaze around to see if he’d caught her admiring the clothing so foolishly, but relaxed when she realized he was still on the other side.

  Rounding the rocks, she saw him at the water’s edge, his pant legs rolled up past his calves and his chest still bare. “It’s perfect.” Violet smoothed the material again and offered him a small smile. “Thank you. It was very thoughtful of you.”

  His cheeks colored a little, and the sight intrigued her. Was he uneasy with compliments? He seemed like such an easy-going person, she found it hard to believe his shyness. She decided not to push it. “So how should we start?”

  “Let’s get in.”

  She looked at the calm surface, but hesitated moving forward. “Are you sure that’s best? Don’t you want to explain it all to me first, before we get in?” She twisted her fingers in front of her but didn’t glance up at him.

  “It’s going to be fine. All we’re going to do is float today.”

  That got her attention. “Float?”

  “Yes.”

  “But what good will that do me?”

  “If you can learn to successfully float, then you won’t drown if you fall in again.”

  She knew he was right, but if she was floating, she wouldn’t have her feet on the ground, and she wouldn’t be able to hold on to him. Anything could go wrong. He could let her go, then she might get caught up by the current and drown, before she ever really learned how to float successfully.

  Why had she thought this was a good idea? He might have saved her before, but that didn’t mean she should risk her life by placing it in his hands again. This was a bad idea. “I’m not so sure about this anymore.”

  “Hey.” He moved from the water over to her and took both her hands in his. He waited until she looked up into his eyes. “I’m going to take care of you.”

  Her breath caught in her lungs at his words. When was the last time anyone had taken care of her? Truly taken care of her?

  Richard had said he wanted to take care of her for the rest of their lives, but once Abigail Broderick had looked his way, he’d changed his tune quick enough. She shouldn’t have trusted him or his words, and Violet didn’t want to be a fool again by trusting another man now. She took a step away from him and said with a hint of wariness, “I don’t know...”

  “Come on, let’s just get in and go from there. We won’t do anything you aren’t comfortable with, and the moment you want to stop or get out, we will. You’re making the choices here. Whatever you say is what we’ll do.”

  “You mean that?”

  “Of course!” He scoffed. “Anyone who would force you to do something isn’t worth dirt. You’re in charge here.”

  Her muscles slowly relaxed and the urge to flee abated. He seemed so offended she didn’t believe him, that it swayed her. “All right. We’ll get in, at least, and see how it goes after that.”

  He held up his hands. “That’s all I’m asking.”

  The corner of her mouth quirked as he released one of her hands and gestured further out in the water. It was almost gallant in the way he did it, as if he were inviting her into Delmonico’s, her favorite restaurant in New York.

  She paused at the edge of the river, took a deep breath, and dipped a toe in. She winced. “It’s just as cold as last time.”

  He snorted. “It’s still spring.”

  “I’m aware. Thank you very much.” Her tone was a bit sharp, and she immediately felt contrite. He was here to help her, and just because she was anxious and afraid, didn’t mean she should take it out on him. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to sound caustic.”

  He changed his grip from her hand to her elbow, urging her in another step. “I completely understand. If our places were reversed, I’d be swearing a blue streak.”

  “No you wouldn’t.” She tossed him an amused glance, grateful he didn’t seem offended by her earlier tone.

  When she brought her attention back to the water, she found she was in knee deep, and her muscles froze involuntarily.

  “Easy,” he said soothingly. “I’m still holding on to you and nothing is going to happen. You’re safe.”

  She nodded hard, but her throat was too tight to speak as she shuffled a bit further in the placid water. She was hip deep when she dug in her feet. “I think this is far enough.” She prayed he agreed with her.

  He glanced over her face, before nodding. “All right. This should be enough for floating.”

  She let out a relieved breath. This was all right. She was here, in the water, and Jimmy was holding on to her. She didn’t feel as if she was about to be ripped from his grasp and tugged downstream. Maybe this wouldn’t be so bad. “What next?”

  “I’m just going to turn you like this.” He angled her so her left side brushed up against his chest. “And now I’m going to lean you back.”

  A brief appreciation of his physique filtered through her mind as he began to lay her on her back, but the instant her backside hit the water, all thoughts of his fine attributes fled. Her eyes flew open, and she flailed when she was caught off balance. Her hands latched onto his forearms and she screeched. “Don’t let go!”

  “I won’t,” he said reassuringly. “Try to relax. I won’t let go until you tell me.”

  She didn’t look up at him as panic flew through her mind. This was crazy. Why had she ever thought this was a good idea?

  “Hey, look at me. Look at me,” he repeated, a little firmer the second time. He waited until she brought her eyes to his. “I’ll protect you.”

  She could see the promise in his eyes, and she decided to believe him. Slowly, the grip on his arms loosened.

  “Good. That’s it!” he praised, and for some reason, it made her want to do more. “I’m going to move my hands underneath you, but you’ll feel my touch the entire time.” He settled his hands behind her back and knees, bringing her body toward the surface.

  She shook, terrified, as well as cold. She was miserable. “What now?”

  “We’re just going to stay like this for a bit, so you can get used to the water. Feel the way it’s holding you up, making you sway with the current? Just keep trying to relax.”

  He made it sound easy, but her muscles were locked up as she shivered.

  “Nice and easy. Just relax.”

  His words became annoying, and she gave him the stink eye from under her lashes.

  He laughed then. “Guess annoying you worked. You’ve relaxed.”

  Her mouth dropped open, and she realized he was right. He’d distracted her for a moment from the cold and fear, and her muscles had responded. “You were trying to annoy me on purpose?”

  “Anything to help you.”

  Her lip quirked, appreciating his attempt to help her. “Sounds like something I’d do.”

  “I believe that.”

  With the heavy weight of his hands beneath her, she floated in the calm water. “This isn’t so bad.”

  “Good. Just stay relaxed. Nice and steady. I’ve been holding you above water mostly, but I’m going to lower you just a tad. I won’t let go,” he quickly added before she could say it.

  As her body sunk a bit more in the water, her ears went under, her eyes widened, and she took several shallow, panting breaths.

  “You’re all right. I’m still here.” He pressed his hands more firmly beneath her. “Try slowing your breathing.”

  It frustrated her that she’d panicked again. Why was this such a hard thing? Jimmy said he wouldn’t let her go, and he hadn’t. Why couldn’t that be enough to get her to relax?

  She focused all her energy on her breathing, taking in deep b
reaths and slowly releasing them. Finally, she felt her muscles loosen again.

  “That’s it.”

  His voice was muffled while her ears were under water, but she could still make out his words. The whole world seemed hazy like this. She looked straight to the sky, the sun kissing the trees as light filtered in, all sounds muted except the steady flow of water and her heart. She closed her eyes, trying to better gauge how her body felt. Light, airy, and relaxed. “This is nice,” she said, her own words sounding warped to her.

  “Do you want to try for more? I can keep my hands under you, just an inch away, but not touching you, if you’re ready?”

  She slowly opened her eyes and met his. He smiled reassuringly, and she appreciated he wasn’t forcing more on her. And for that alone, she gave a small, single nod and said, “Let’s try.”

  The respect she saw in his eyes made her feel lighter, more confident. With his help, she could do this. She was sure of it.

  Chapter 3

  Jimmy wasn’t sure what he was feeling as he held Violet in his arms, acting as the safety net she needed while floating. She was terrified. He could see it in the tension in her muscles and by the way her eyes flew open. But the fact she’d agreed to try something more, impressed him. He hadn’t even needed to goad her into it. “Ready?”

  “Mm hmm,” she said, even though she didn’t sound too confident.

  “You can do this.” Slowly, he lessened the pressure on her back, not completely releasing her until he was sure she could float on her own. He didn’t want her to sink on her first try and become even more afraid. He wanted to build her confidence.

  Little by little, he let go, until he wasn’t touching her any longer. He grinned. “You’re doing it,” he said softly, not wanting to startle her.

  Her face lit up. “I’m doing it!” She lowered her chin, causing her body to sink, but before he could reach for her again, she corrected herself, forcing her body up into a float.

  “Well done. You’re a natural.”

  She laughed in satisfaction. “I never thought I’d be able to do it.”

  “And now you have.” He let her float another moment and relished her triumph. She’d come a lot farther today than he’d expected. She’d be swimming in no time.

  As he stood there, guarding her, he watched as strands of her hair swirled aimlessly in the water. It shone like a black bear’s fur in the sun, but with a richer hue. Her hair was a deep dark brown, but when wet, it looked almost blue-black. His fingers itched to feel it, but he stopped himself. “I think we’ve done enough for today. What do you think?”

  She let out a breath, as if she wasn’t quite ready to stop, but then finally closed her eyes in agreement. “You’re right. We can always come back.”

  “Absolutely.” He brought his hands back under her and helped maneuver her until she was upright.

  Her swim costume molded against her frame, and it took every bit of his willpower to keep his gaze on her own and not let it wander anywhere else. She was breathtaking, more so than he’d ever realized. She’d had such a sharp bite, it had kept him from seeing her, from really noticing. But he noticed now.

  He tucked her hand through his and led her out of the water, taking care so she wouldn’t slip, though the muddy bank made it difficult for either of them to keep their footing. Once they were on firm ground, he released her. “There’s a drying cloth in my satchel. You can take it with you and get dressed. I’ll use it once you’re done.”

  “Thank you.” She walked toward his horse to fetch it, her stride confident. But when she turned back to him, her cheeks were pink when he snapped his traitorous gaze from her backside up to her face. “You’re staring.”

  He shrugged sheepishly. “I didn’t mean to. Forgive me, that isn’t very gentlemanly behavior.”

  “Maybe not gentlemanly, but it is natural, isn’t it?” Her eyes ran over his form in return, before she shyly turned away.

  He grinned, elated to find his body obviously appealed to her.

  She gave him another smile, before grabbing the cloth and disappearing behind the rocks. She might’ve tried to appear worldly, but he could tell it wasn’t natural for her, and he wondered if she’d ever seen this much of a man.

  He paused as those thoughts filled his mind. He shouldn’t be thinking about what Violet thought of his body or how much she’d seen of any other man. He wasn’t courting her, and he had no intention of doing so. He was here to help her, to teach her to swim. Nothing more.

  But then he thought about the pure joy that had filled her face when she’d realized she’d been floating alone, the way she teased him, how he noticed her in ways he shouldn’t, and wondered if he was lying to himself.

  After a few minutes, Violet came around the boulder and handed him the drying cloth, then twisted her hair and pinned up the wet tendrils. He wished he could do it for her, which was a crazy thought, but the desire to do such an intimate thing for her remained.

  “Thank you for letting me dry off first. You must be freezing.”

  He should be. Instead, his thoughts, as wrong as they were, had kept him warm. Far too warm. “It’s not too bad. Better than winter.”

  She smirked. “But we wouldn’t be swimming in winter, would we?”

  “No. No we wouldn’t.” He shook his head and moved behind the rock for privacy. “When would you like to have another lesson?” he called out.

  “Any time, my schedule isn’t exactly full. When would be a good day for you?”

  That was something else they had in common. There wasn’t anything filling in either of their lives. He hardly ever had anything scheduled, which was the whole problem with his life. He was grateful he didn’t have to labor, didn’t have to do anything he didn’t want to, but he was tired of it. There was only so much sitting around or fishing a person could do, before they went mad. He was close to that point.

  Maybe he should move forward with his idea to invest in the railroad. He’d have to find partners in the east, but he had plenty of money to invest and time wasn’t an issue, so he could travel as needed. Besides, nothing was keeping him busy around here, so why not?

  He put on a dry shirt before answering, “How about Thursday?”

  “All right. But…”

  “But?” He pulled on a dry pair of breeches, waiting for her answer. When she didn’t say anything more, he stepped from behind the rock into view. “Is there a problem?”

  Violet stepped forward confidently, but she twisted her fingers in front of her, showing him her unease. “No. Yes. Maybe?”

  “Okay...?” He held out his arms. “Tell me.”

  “I don’t like feeling indebted to anyone.”

  “Hold it.” He held up a hand. “You don’t owe me. Besides, you’re saving me from boredom, so maybe I owe you.”

  “I’m serious.” She narrowed her eyes. “I really don’t like to feel as if I owe anyone. And you’re taking time to teach me to do this. Plus, I know I’m not the easiest person to get along with, so I feel even more awkward.”

  “Do you want to stop?” He held his breath.

  She shook her head. “No. I’d like to continue with the lessons. I like feeling prepared and in control. I don’t ever want to experience the same debilitating panic I felt when I fell in the river.”

  He let out the breath, surprised by how much it mattered to him. “Then what should we do?” He didn’t know how to make her feel better about this.

  “Well, is there something I can do for you?”

  “Like what? Cook me dinner?”

  Her lips pursed in a smile. “Unfortunately, you’d be better off without my help there. I might poison you.”

  “Not skilled in culinary arts?”

  “Not at all.”

  He wanted to laugh at the disgust in her voice. “I’m not exactly accomplished at preparing food either. I eat in the hotel or at Sally’s. Maybe you could bring me a cake from Sylvia if you like?”

  Her hands went to her h
ips and she puffed out a frustrated breath. “Having my cook make you something isn’t what I meant. I’d then owe her, wouldn’t I? What is something I can do for you?”

  He laughed and rubbed the back of his neck. “I really don’t need anything.”

  “Really?” She arched a brow. “There’s nothing? I may not be the best at cooking or running a farm, but I am from a powerful family, and I’m educated, even more than most men.”

  “Really?” She glared at him, and he realized he’d offended her. “Not that I don’t believe you. I’m just surprised. Although, it does make perfect sense you’d have had the best tutors.”

  “I did.” Although she didn’t sound very happy about it or as if she were gloating. More like she’d simply stated a fact and was possibly even a little annoyed by it. “My parents always made sure my education wasn’t lacking. Who wants an ignorant wife? Although, from my rather limited experience with the male gender, I believe most all would, in fact, like a bit of ignorant fluff on their arm.”

  He wasn’t sure how to respond. He was surprised, but pleased she was so knowledgeable, though concerned about her own opinion on the matter of intelligence and men’s preference of women. Book knowledge might not be so very important in towns like Promise Creek, especially when he couldn’t see Violet teaching at a school, but there were other uses. “I bet you know a lot about all subjects,” he said conversationally, and he could hear the approval in his tone. He was sure she did too.

  He leaned over and put on his boots while he waited for her response.

  “More than you know. I was destined to be some magnate’s wife. A decoration, but still, one that wouldn’t embarrass him. I had to know how to converse in society at all levels. I had to be knowledgeable about business, finance, history, languages, manners, all while looking like a princess.” She sounded disgusted, as if she wasn’t proud of any of it, but then she shrugged as if it didn’t matter. “Who knows, maybe some of it might be useful to you.”

  Jimmy didn’t think he’d ever need to know those things, as he didn’t plan on living in the east.